accountability

Whose Bad Day Is This // Own Your Own State

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There’s a move some people make that took me years to name precisely. They have a bad day, or a bad season. Something at work, something in their own life — nothing to do with you. And instead of carrying it, sitting with it, or owning it, they find a surface to discharge it on. … Read more

Real Intense Feeling Can Be Dead Wrong

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There’s a particular kind of person I’ve spent real time around, and the pattern is always the same: the harder they feel something, the more certain they become they’re right. The intensity alone is the proof, to them…JUST BECAUSE they feel it strongly — therefore to them, it’s real and true, therefore you owe them, … Read more

The First Lie Is Always to Yourself

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(Previously called “When Love Dies Before The Body Does” I wanted to blame something external. A child abuse and in the end, the kid (Megan) passed away…and the details that came up in the papers…the kind that lodges in you and won’t leave. I’m not going to retell it. The details aren’t the point, and … Read more