Real Intense Feeling Can Be Dead Wrong

There’s a particular kind of person I’ve spent real time around, and the pattern is always the same: the harder they feel something, the more certain they become they’re right. The intensity alone is the proof, to them…JUST BECAUSE they feel it strongly — therefore to them, it’s real and true, therefore you owe them, … Read more

Most Fights Aren’t About What Happened.

A couple of years back, I clipped a stranger with my bag once. An accident — I lifted it, it swung wider than I’d judged, and it caught the woman behind me, out of my blindspot. It’s my fault, and I should have checked before lifting my bag (though allow me to add also…not sure … Read more

Complaining Is Data Without an Address

In 2019 I wrote a post about how to stop complaining. I just reread it, and the strangest thing in it is one word I used without noticing where I’d taken it from. I wrote that repeated negative thoughts become “strongholds” in your mind. That’s not a self-help word. It’s Paul’s word — and I … Read more

The Last Person to Know You’re Burning Out Is You

I woke up in the middle of the night fighting for my life…in my dream of course kakaka. In the dream I was surrounded — a slow, relentless horde closing in, and a group of us beating them back with whatever we had in our hands. They didn’t tire. They just kept coming. I remember … Read more

Stop Billing Your Parents – They’re First Time Humans Too.

Your parents were first-time humans too — that’s the grace. What you do with the hand they dealt you is on you now — that’s the responsibility. When we were kids, our parents seem like gods to us. They know everything, they have every answer, they never fail. Then you grow up, and somewhere along … Read more