I realized over the years, as I slow down to be more mindful of God and spiritual matters, of my own habits, thoughts and values, and values, actions and decisions of others – I am a weirdo.
I realized that I’m a God-loving/fearing kinda old school person, where I prioritize and make decisions that are closest to
- good and right and ethical and legal
- good for my family, self, loved ones, colleagues, employees
in that order.
And that’s what guides me in my decisions to leave convenient and higher paying work / organizations / individuals / relationships whose values don’t match with those 3 mentioned priorities.
To extrapolate and expand is that I will not want a relationship, be it personal, workwise to anything, anyone or any organization whose practices go against God/bible, illegal, wrong, unethical….even if it may provide more money and convenience for myself or my family or loved ones or employees.
What is wrong / illegal, is wrong / illegal.
Someone I know told me, “what’s wrong and illegal differs depending on which side you stand in” ie people in power can do wrong and it can be looked over, smoothed over, smudged over and the truth may be buried by people with more money and power.
Whilst this is true and common practice in the world today, which I acknowledge, I don’t agree with it and therefore I won’t be part of it simply because “everyone does it” – that doesn’t make sense.
And another truth of the world is, as what I had seen and experienced, multiple times, people will be willing and able to “unsee or ignore” evil to be comfortable. Be it to earn the same amount of money or more than before, or to be able to hang out with the same familiar and comfortable group of people.
Yes, people have needs – food needs to be put on the table, bills need to be paid and the like.
I get it.
That being said, my value and need is more contingent on being true to
- God’s prompting and direction for me
- staying true to God’s prompting and words and
- not doing or being part of any organization or individual who find it OK to be / do illegal, unethical, wrong and bad stuff
And even though I walk away from a comfortable amount of money and lifestyle, I find it perfectly OK, and what’s more, I feel complete at peace and in alignment with God, and I’ve been feeling His presence so much more than before, and today, 2nd June 2020 – I feel a perfect peace, a kairos moment, where I feel that
This, right here, right now, is the right place to be, with the right persons, and in the right direction.
All those struggles during the 18 months of sabbatical to figure out what I want to do next, and where I want to go next, and who I am – it’s clicking into place, most of them at least – and moreso, another thing to consider and realize: all those promises that was given by individuals and organizations, all turned out to be naught and empty retractable promises and words.
God has never let me down, in fact, He has brought me to heights and places and people whom I’m grateful to meet and go, and I am certain that He has so much more in store for me (and you).
Right here, right now, is rightly where I’m supposed to be.
Do what you need to survive, and when you’re ready and able to, level up: choose to be conscious, to participate in activities and work that add good to the world, and do not support evil / bad individuals and organizations. Even if “everyone is doing it” or even if it’s inconvenient.
Do not tolerate nor serve evil, for evil just begets more evil.
PS: The side bonus on top of that is that I am also free, free from nonsense dramatic lying / bitching / moaning / blackmails / emotional manipulation with individuals and organizations that are just not goodfit with my values and not worth my time.
Edit: Added this portion
1) I believe and think that most humans react and are strongly influenced by social cues and triggers, such as following and modelling others ala “if so-so / statistics are doing it, it must or should be OK to do so” – yes and no.
A group of people doing the wrong thing, such as police brutality or ignoring safe distancing in light of COVID or group bullying…is still wrong, no matter how popular or how many people do it. What is wrong is wrong even with a group doing it.
If it’s done to effect and affect good, such as
- every human planting a tree a day
- every human cut down meat consumption by 10 – 100%
- every human saving more and investing into index funds
- every human doing a random act of kindness and generosity
…that makes the world a better place.
So, guard your heart and mind – be mindful, thoughtful and think / do more good, not just people others are doing it, but because it’s good in the first place; and resist stupid / evil / wrong social cues – a bunch of people doing wrong / bad stuff doesn’t make things right.
Do not look to newspapers or the mass for guidance.
Do not be an empty echo chamber.
It can be tough to be contrarion and to contradict the mass and convenience, but I will hold onto God, good, positive, right and ethical approach no matter how tough it is, and I hope and wish the same thing for you as well – what is good, is good nonetheless.
And God is always good..
2) I thank God for guiding me and my wife to be frugal and to quickly pay down our HDB flat in less than 10 years.
I am aware that we are blessed and the combination of low expenses (no kids then and not much spending habits) allowed us to quickly pay down the single largest payment that we had. We don’t own a car even till today (still no need even with 2 kids at least not yet) and this is one of the supporting reasons why we could also have the flexibility of choosing where and who we want to work with.
I believe if I was highly leveraged or have lots of debts and commitments, that would make me think more of working longer “just to put food on the table and to pay the bills and be comfortable” even if I had to work with individuals and organization whose values differ from mine, just for a while, but for mid to long term, I would switch out for relationships with individuals and organizations are both GodFit and GoodFit with me.
I’m the founder and writer here at NigelChua.com; as well as serial entrepreneur, therapy business entrepreneur, digital entrepreneur, investor and also happy husband, father and Christian.
I love good success and freedom and learned early in life on importance of making more and entrepreneurship. Started and sold off a business for 7-figures; built another 7-figure one and growing it further, as well as building/investing into other businesses and investments as well as advisory works.
I help motivate and/or bring clarity to people as to building their lives based on what matters most to them – this could be earning more with entrepreneurship or a side hustle; or scaling back their expenses (or kill their mindless spending and keeping up with the Joneses’); improving communications, relationships, problem-solving and other growth-related matters.
All for one main purpose: to help readers become happier by build their lives according to what matters most to them.
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